LOVE

I just realized I have never been in Love, as in Love Love. I guess you get what I mean.
Anyways, as painfully am I accepting that fact. I want to share a few days of experience I had with a dear friend, who is in Love, Love. It’s beautiful, and I want me to have it too.

Ok, now for the characters of the story - Hot handsome, talented Mr. Salsa & Sweet adorable, Artistic Mr. Web. My friend is Mr. Salsa, I know him for quite sometime, a very vibrant positive guy. He had been in love lets say not just once, but in love love oh just once. And that magical feeling makes you go that extra mile. I used to say Christmas is the time when people go that extra mile for the loved and near ones, but now I have to rectify it and say be in LOVE.

Both of them are expatriates in Oman, and they met randomly but not just like that, but it happened. Oops my mistake, if Mr. Web read it he is gonna be furious, as he said, “we the met by the will of God”, and I have to agree it was written somewhere in HIS book that they are for each other. To me they are like Dark & White Chocolate, different, but sweet rich as individuals but awesome when together.

Mr. Web was in the country under work permit, but somehow the job was not how he was hoping it to be. Still he kept working (me personally won’t do it, I would have grumbled a lot), what ever he was asked to do. And in mean time Mr. Web & Mr. Salsa met. Frankly speaking Mr. Salsa, was blown away the first time he met Mr. Web. If it was by cuteness in the first glance, it was by his personality that won him over as the time proceeded. And when I say time proceeded it’s not like months or something but just few hours. They are in Love, and I am very happy for both.

As my work takes me to the interiors of Oman, I was not aware of the whole thing, and I guess I met him after week after the first meeting of the couple. And I have to say I was a bit skeptical, as I did not want him to go through a dramatic break up again, but I kept listening to him. Believe it or not but his eyes was sparkling, there was some aura of happiness. He was worried about Mr. Web’s work, how much he had to toil, and just because he is here on a different work permit rather than what he is talented and artistic enough to do. Fortunately for me, Mr. Web loves to capture moments of them together even if its shopping, eating out, walking around etc, and just having a glance on those you are able to feel the love both of them have for each other. Yes I know I am trying to write about their love, but I am not able to put it in words, its an experience guys. Be in love, not just love, but Love Love.

Anyways one fine day, they filed a legal case against the employer for malpractice, and Mr. Web won the case. But the catch was, he had to leave country. And that is fucking painful man. Yes of course he can come back to the country on a different permit, still the separation and the surety that when will he be back was unpredictable. I was unfortunate to see the pain of separation, and I never wish that upon anyone. Though Mr. Salsa speaks daily and does know what Mr. Web is doing, its that feeling of he not being in his arms, not getting the aroma of his body, and ofcourse the killer smile that tears him from with in. I was able to literally see him cry/ pain in his words, and I was so sorry that there was nothing I could do, but listen to him and hold his hand. Mr. Web’s entry permit processing was delayed due to many factors, and during all that time I found him to grow more in faith and love to the Almighty above. He truly believed that there is a higher power and He is testing their love and also is sending His angels to ease him out through the process. I have to say, I have never seen him so thankful and in faith. Love does make us a better person. Every time I met him, I felt he grew stronger in faith in God above and his love to Mr. Web.

And I am sure God is there looking down on all of us. I think this is the best example. Mr. Web came out to his family about his life & love of life Mr. Salsa, and believe it or not they are happy and both of them have their blessings. And though Mr. Salsa had not come out, come out about his life to his family, they knew and understood his love and affection that he has to Mr. Web. And do you know what Mr. Salsa’s family did called up Mr. Web, and welcomed him to their lives. He definitely knows what best for all of us, and always looks after us. I am sure oneday, ill experience this blessing of His.

Anyway coming back to the love birds, We (He along with all his friends and well wishers) were expecting the Visa permit on 14th Feb, still a day later doesn’t matter. Yesterday, he called me up by mid afternoon, and the moment I saw his name flash knew the good news is here. (I am not sure if I said thank you, so Thank you for answering all our prayers) He was crying with happiness, even in his sobs, I could feel his excitement and happiness. Just met him today few hours back, and he is like charged with love, as Mr. Web is arriving today evening, I am sure if he was able to make time the clock go faster he definitely would have……..:)



Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah to both of you, and desperately wishing that you both will be by my side for my beach wedding. Hey I will have my love in my arms too, I am naughty but I don’t thnk I am bad, and He will bless me as he has done Mr. Salsa & Mr. Web.

Life As It Is

Jan 12th 2012, commemorated 1 year of our relation. Yet to christen it, don’t know what to christen it as or should I say I am afraid to call it as a love. Whatever it is, it’s almost a year since I met red wine. And weirdly I had stopped writing after meeting him, ok the reason for that was, I did not want him to accidentally discover my radical theories , and be blown away……
We hit off, when he had written to me responding to a statement I had made in my Manjam profile, regarding my desire to dance, and leave back all the stiffness of me. Spoke to him on phone, and had clicked off as he mentioned something off bollywood movie (guess most of you remember I am bollywood movie buff, and still is), and of course his profile name, stood apart. And these two factors made me overlook the fact that he was married and that too with a kid. Ya me being me, usually brushes off such personalities and move off, or should I say look for a better hunt...lol. Anyways, the very same night we met, went for dinner and ended up in bed (all faults goes to the dinner – Turkish food). To me it was casual sex, but I guess it was not for him, and we started to meet daily, and ended up in bed. I should have realized things had started to change, but I did not, guess I need to get a new pair of glasses, anyways I think it was the lure of sex (don’t need to go hunting ) that made me overlook things.
Wanted or unwanted, I ve ended up in a relationship. And I know that its just a phase, and it will pass. But no idea if I wanted to see all the drama when it ends.
Oh boy the ride ain’t was smooth, a bloody roller coaster that it was, how many times did we fight, and weirdly most of our fights happen around 12 – 14 of every month, guess anniversary presents…lol. If I got to list the reasons its gonna be a long list, but I think ill touch the tip of the iceberg.
- Me not wanting to accept the fact that I am in a relationship and that too, to a married guy. (which still I have not been able to come into terms)
- His over protective nature & love, POSSESSIVENESS (makes me feel suffocated)
- He is bloody caring or should I say over caring. (Come on let me be me. Let me eat what and when I want)
- He spying on me (which made me all the more rebellious)
- He trying to tell me which all friends I can meet.
- He trying to control me as his wife, and wanting me to accompany him to most of the places (one day even I blurted out saying I am not your trophy to carry around, yup I can be mean)
- Sex was good, but sex everyday. It was good initially but later on it turned out to be like a routine.
To me sex is the booster for a relationship not the reason to be in a relationship. Sex has to be happily consensual if not then its rape atleast in my terms. I have to say they were certain instants when I felt, WTF.
Still, I have to say we had quite a good times. Trips to many places, long drives, I seriously like the night drives , mountains, caves, beaches, (even when to a secluded beach and I turned out to be naughty..lol). He likes to celebrate the days, which is good but I am not a day celebration person. Ofcourse it has to be special, but not gaudy and pomp, but simple and elegant. Weirdly we had some tensions on most of these DAYS. Like Valentine’s Day, Birthday Pooja, Diwali, Christmas, you name it and was filled with tensions. I remember on valentine’s Day, I was with a friend of mine, and as we (atleast I) did not have plans, and he was not in town. But he just showed up, with flowers (Yes yes it was sweet) but I was not very happy. Yes I know its not easy living with me.
Hats off to him, to accept my tantrums. Have to agree how or whatever the relationship is, its not easy. It requires work man, strenuous mental work. Seriously man, be it hetro or homo relationship, its fucking hard and top if you got deadlines, and work pressures, it’s a hell of a ride.
Had broken off the whole thing, but we both were miserable. So I guess the logical thing to do was signing an MoU. It is working, we even had some group therapy session  after the MoU…..lol.

Guess we guys are depended on each other in a mutual way, but at the end of the day, the fact still remains he is married settled with a family, and I am still an outsider. The hunt for my life partner still continues….. (thankfully he has accepted that fact). And on the background there is still the pressure of marriage from my parents, and I am sure its gonna increase as my cousin is getting married in few days time. Have not found a way to break the news to them that I don’t want to marry a girl.

Anyways, having written all that, I guess its ok if I say “Where art though, love of my life?”
Could not resist posting the relationship status chart. Where do you guys stand?